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When I was little, I used to be jealous that boys got to have a penis and pee standing up.

But now that I’m older, I know better.

Their balls are so weak, it takes them down with a single tap. They can’t wear some clothes we can because their penis and balls get in the way. We can walk and run easier because there’s no penis hanging between our legs. Our orgasms are ten times better than anything they’ll ever experience. 

Now that I think about it, if given the choice, why would anyone want to be a boy?