What do you mean where’s my penis? I’m a girl, of course I don’t have one. Didn’t your parents teach you about this stuff? No? How could we have gone out this whole time without you knowing? Well, I guess now you know how I was able to take that soccer ball to the crotch without crumpling over. No wonder you kept asking me if I was OK. Yeah, it doesn’t hurt girls to get hit down there. Pretty cool right?